It's like a sea-saw.....this side...then that. My mind and heart. One moment you are that strong and firm that nothing seems impossible, everything is immaterial and the very next, you feel weak, feeble...vulnerable. Guess this is how life is....uncertain....unpredictable and... unassuming! It takes a U-turn just when you think the road is straight and lo....you find yourself caught, tangled and zapped!

It's weird, yet so human. Yet, I feel different...in fact, it's a new and alien feeling. And from here, as I look back, I have no regrets. There may have been things that I could have done better, but surely, there's nothing I did was wrong.

But, there's one thing I am happy about! I still have options and choices to make and I still have my heart and mind to help me make them :)

The options and my take on them:

1. Cry or Smile? I cry...I need to get it out of my system.....and then there's no holding back my smile....I smile at life, challenging it to come...fight it out with me :)
2. Hold on or let loose! I do both. Holding on makes me go back to it and then i let loose...rationalizing everything and then, deciding in my favor...for who else, but me, will think what's best for me :)
3. Stay put or move on? Stay put, if you need to, if you still have faith that things will come around...else....Move on! I am still to make up my mind on this :( ....Am open to suggestions!
4. Live in the past or look forward? I cherish the past as it's part of my life. And I am now looking forward to see what's next in store for me! Come what may...I am prepared...and better than ever before :)
5. Shut the world out or welcome it? I am welcoming it yet again....for there's no way I am going to let go all the beautiful things and wonderful people around me. After all, I got just this life to live as myself :)

Have many more similar ones before me and I have decided or am deciding my take on them! And life will continue to throw situations at me every now and then.... after all, that's what life is all about, right? I might tremble...I might fall...I might break down. But I know that there's one thing I will always have with me - Myself! I owe all respect, every smile, each bit of happiness to myself. Losing myself to situations will be to lose my confidence...my self-esteem....my very identity! And I'll never let that happen!

Existing will always be an option, but once again, I CHOOSE TO LIVE!